We learn to love in our family of origin. Our program teaches you how to change your habits with your partner and optimize your relational space. You’ll seek out a safe space to work on your issues no matter how or who you love.

We are working on it.

Almost a decade ago, we abandoned ‘treatment as usual’ for couples because our experience mirrored what the literature says: general, supportive counseling does not work for repairing troubled relationships. Couples often find our services after multiple treatment failures.

The Mindful Mates Program is an innovative approach to couples work. This structured, phase-based program combines evidence-based practices from Imago and Gottman with the new science of interpersonal neurobiology. Couples will learn how stress and attachment patterns in their family of origin affect their relationship today. We specialize in and welcome dual-trauma couples.

You will learn to show and feel all the A's

  • Affection
  • Alliance
  • Affinity
  • Attunement
  • Affirmation
  • Addoration
  • Attachment
  • Alignment
  • Assured
  • Appreciated

From Toxic to Teamwork

If you are a couple that is experiencing distancing, conflict, and ‘dry spells’ (no sex), you are not alone. The demands of our individual-focused Euro-Western world do not support your relationship. Couples can find themselves lost at sea with no way to chart a course back to shore. Couples in distress find themselves stuck in destructive behavior loops, either avoiding issues entirely or becoming easily dysregulated (angry, irritated) with each other. Some couples are so distressed that their relationship becomes violent or toxic, truly affecting optimal functioning in all domains of life. Our program is designed to teach couples how to reestablish safe conversations to co-regulate and work as a team.

Our approach

Your journey to a better relationship begins with a thorough assessment of the strengths and problems in your relationship. After your initial consultation, you will start Phase 1 of the program. In this phase, you will embark on a journey of discovery about how attachment and love were modeled in your family of origin. You will discover how these old action sequences impact your most important relationships. Resources for self-paced learning are assigned throughout the program. Ideally, you will see your couples therapist at least every other week, but the self-paced education and materials help keep things moving forward when this frequency is not possible.

Traci was an integral part in helping to guide us through the challenges in our relationship over the last year. She was there for us whether we required patience, composure, direction, or instruction. Never did we feel like she was taking sides or picking favorites. She helped us to rebuild our relationship from the ground up, giving us the knowledge and clarity to recognize our bad habits and the tools we needed to start forming new healthier ones together. Traci truly was a steady and peaceful presence, and the help we received from her teachings will undoubtedly translate into our love and life as we move forward.

S. December 2017

Traci was fantastic, she helped us jump in the deep and start confronting things we hadn’t been able to for years, but so gently it wasn’t too much of a shock to the system. I love the communication techniques she taught us. Traci really showed great care and concern for us and made time for us despite the fact we are halfway across the globe. Her passion for what she does really showed through. Thank you Traci.

S. December 2017

Resources

Phase 1: Education & Preparation
Phase 4: Attachment & Healthy Relationships
Phase 5: Rebuild & Restore
Phase 2: Remembering & Rebuilding
Phase 3: Somatics: Healing the Body After Trauma